Disposable Children

        Eventually, all the faces became a blur as I realized I was disposable; nothing more than a paper cup that once held water. But now that I am empty, I am discarded and traded in for a new cup whenever thirst beckons.     I changed my colors to fit each new family. But over time, I quit. What was the…

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Thank you kelly clarkson 

https://youtu.be/CTTjLxXFg0k *click the YouTube link. It’s the most relevant song I have ever found.  When I was a kid you tore up my room looking for my words. I don’t think you did it because you were worried about me, though. I think you did it because I was your competition. How can you compete with a kid? You were grown and could do whatever…

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Petrified wood 

If i were to write a book, where would I start? My earliest memory? I have a couple of those.  But which one came first? No, I won’t start there. So then, where? Maybe this can be my start. It’s 3 am and I decided to blog on the meaning of it all and stopped blogging when I found myself reading about nihilism. My college…

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What is “God”?

​My foster parents hid behind the concept of God like snakes in a man’s shadow. Innocently using him to keep cool, having the man believe they were non venomous. I wonder if I came out of my foster home with a form of PTSD from years of a cult like mentality, I think I did. I was chatting with a new friend one morning, years…

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Session 1

********     I no longer have any secrets left. with my coat of many colors being worn for all to see, I hide deep within myself to protect my heart from their thoughts and judgement.  I am the kid on the baseball team that is not any good but still gets out there and tries. I can’t throw the ball, and in all my…

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1993-1996

  She slowly opened her eyes only to realize she was not dreaming. The soft whispers were coming from the hallway; not the vague, elaborate dream of princesses and castles. Squeezing her eyes shut, she held on to the emotions the dream evoked and tried to reconstruct the images.    The whispers became frantic and she could hear her father grunting. Her stomach began to…

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